:) *it's a fake smile*

I'm looking for a suitable word to describe these recent days,after i start my form 6 school life. Disaster is the word .I don't know what to say anymore,words couldn't fully describe my feelings,nothing could.Well,i forgot when is the last time i really laugh my heart out,now,i could hardly even smile,although i tried my very best to force myself to.Believe it or not,it's not because of those stupid idiot homework,not even those freaking scary syllabus too,yea..i never really take a heart of those things.What makes me felt so dispirited was actually  the surroundings,those hypocrite people around me,those who take advantages of me for granted,the feeling of not being understood ,the fear of unknown,everything and everything,i knew that i couldn't explain it well,i never did.I always believe that there's a better tomorrow,but now..i'm not so sure bout it anymore.If God really exists,i pray to you,please let me escape from this nausea world.

RESPECT ME AS I RESPECT YOU PLEASE.

I seriously couldn't believe that working for you is like giving my whole life to you.Yes,i can understand that you installed more than half a dozen of CCTV all around the shop is to prevent theft happen,to prevent us from stealing money from you(as if we will and we could...*shaking head disappointedly*).But  please..please..what you should really do is watching out for us but not WATCHING US AND STALKING US!C'mon la,poor business not our fault,we couldn't force those customer to come in and buy clothes from you wert,moreover with your worst quality and super fucking  freaking HIGH price of those shit  clothes..what more do you expect?Fine,i'm your worker and you're the big BOSS,maybe i should just shut my big mouth from complaining,but i just don't know that i could stand it for how long...Anyway,life still go on(although its sucks).
                                                          *pray for a better tomorrow*

I NEED TO APOLOGIZE

I try to figure out a right word to say this.All i could say is the word:Sorry...
I'm sorry that i'm not perfect,
I'm sorry that i'm not good enough for you
I'm sorry if i've being slight to you sometimes
I'm sorry that i'm kinda sentimental sometimes
I'm sorry that i'm not good at express my feelings
I'm sorry that i have said something stupid sometimes
I'm sorry that i couldn't be the one you expect me to be
I'm sorry that i pretend that you're nothing to me sometimes
I'm sorry that i used to put the blame on others instead of myself
I'm sorry that i'm not the person who can always be with you whenever you need me
I'm sorry that i can do nothing to compensate the mischief which i've bring but to say sorry.






TO MY FRIENDS,FAMILY,AND THE SPECIAL ONE...I'm really sorry.